The Crazy Diaries

25 Aug

On Monday I had to say goodbye to a very good friend at the office. He and his family are relocating to the east coast – an exciting homecoming for them and a really sad loss for those of us being left behind.

His version of cleaning out his desk had four steps: throw away the garbage, recycle the recyclables, pack what’s to be saved into a single banker box and turf the rest on my desk. I inherited all kinds of crap from this guy: pens that barely work, broken pencil crayons, Clorox disinfecting wipes…My work place has suddenly gotten very crowded. And unruly.

Amid all the debris, there was one gem: a black, hard-cover notebook. On the front there is a label with his name printed in tiny letters in the corner and inside he had used only one page on which he had written a to-do list.

No word on whether or not any of those things ever got done.

In life, I have a ridiculous obsession with stationary. I hoard the shit like it’s the only thing that’s going to help me survive the apocalypse.

And who knows, maybe it will.

Pretty papers, quaint correspondence kits, copious amounts of postcards (that I’m only now finding reason to use!); I’ve got way more of it all than I’m ever going to need. But my biggest vice are notebooks.

I collect them.

I see one in a store with a lovely cover or that perfect binding or a creamy texture to the pages and IT IS MINE. I decide that each one should be used for something very special and then I either save it for whatever that something special is (Note: I never find out what that something special is) or I use one or two pages and then never touch it again. There might be a support group for this sort of thing, I don’t know.

Anyway, because it has become such a problem I finally had to forbid myself from buying anymore notebooks. As my luck would have it, this display of willpower was soon followed by the revelation that I needed to start keeping a journal/diary again. My reasons are thus:

1) A million different thoughts and ideas can go through my head in a day, some of which I know I want to post. But by the end of the day when I get home I’ve either forgotten the essence of what I wanted to say or I’m too exhausted to write it all out. So yes, my aim is to pull a Bridget Jones and carry that thing around with me everywhere. I’m a writer, dammit!

2) Speaking of being a writer, I’m so not. Well, sort of, but really, any grammar-savvy reader will be able to tell right away by looking at my posts that a real writer would never allow half the shit I publish to see the light of day (at least not without the help of a very patient editor). But I want to be better at writing and I see keeping a journal as a good way to improve.

3) Finally, even though this blog is anonymous, there are still things I’m either not comfortable with writing or that I’m simply not ready to tell on the internet. Regardless, these things still need an outlet and sometimes just moving them from the mind into the real helps.

Having the perfect notebook is essential when it comes to keeping a diary. Making sure that it’s something fresh is also important. This is the book that you are going to document all of your most precious memories and darkest secrets in! Don’t those things deserve to be housed in a wicked-awesome tome?

Of course they do.

And yet, when my friend handed me that black, hard-cover notebook with his name on the label and to-do list on the first page, I knew right away that it was what I was looking for. It’s not pretty and it’s been bumped and spilled on already, but it also belonged to a friend. I don’t think I’m going to change anything about it; his name and list can stay.

I think this is going to work out very nicely. I’ll let you know how it goes.

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6 Responses to “The Crazy Diaries”

  1. Whitney August 25, 2010 at 6:32 pm #

    Love it! Also, you’re not alone in notebook-collecting. There probably is a support group out there for people like us!

    • Jam August 25, 2010 at 6:36 pm #

      But I mean, REALLY, would we actually go if there was one?

      I thought not.

      • Whitney August 26, 2010 at 12:00 pm #

        You make a good point.

        (Here I cling to my five notebooks stacked next to my computer.)

  2. alonewithcats August 28, 2010 at 3:48 am #

    Blogging is the closest I’ve ever come to keeping a diary. Probably because I don’t hoard notebooks. I am more likely to hoard notebooks than write a diary, though. I’m not sure what that says about me.

  3. Chrissy August 29, 2010 at 9:45 pm #

    I have an issue with office supplies in general. I love pens, I own 3 day planners for 2010, they each have a few things written in them. I buy one telling myself that I will be more organized in my life, start writing stuff down then loose the damn thing so I give up, then the cycle starts all over again. I got a new notebook off of etsy last month…nothing in it yet.

  4. kat August 30, 2010 at 9:47 am #

    I think that stationary and such has just gotten more popular since technology. People don’t want to let go. I love it.

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